Ripped Seam
by hexterah
Summary: A post-NJO story about Jacen, Jaina, Tenel Ka, Zekk, etc. just hanging out at the Temple and relaxing for once -- some bottled up feelings get shared as well. One-poster/short story. Written: 11/01/2004


**Author's Note: **This is technically a fanfiction to a song. I heard the song and got this idea – so the italics are the lyrics. And the song is called "Now Is Forever" by Eiffel 65 (yes, the band that did the Blue song XD). It's basically a story about some good friends getting together after the war with the Yuuzhan Vong and just kind of hanging out. Written: 11/01/2004.

* * *

**Ripped Seam**

A stray cough erupted from the thin lips of one Jacen Solo. A man who saw death, destruction; countless millions slaughtered during the war with the technophobic Yuuzhan Vong. The past years were spent mostly in the heat of battle - this was the first chance in what seemed like forever that he had to just sprawl out and lay around.

His room at the Jedi Academy was sparse at the moment. He had arrived for a meeting with the other knights and the Jedi Masters. It was a very official meeting, a very important one. They were to discuss the future of the Jedi Order. Everyone was coming to Ossus for it. The meeting was the next day and Jacen knew that just about everyone had already arrived.

He had showed up a few days early and spent his time meandering around the large corridors and long hallways, exploring the Academy as thoroughly as he could. The day everyone began to arrive, Jacen had greeted his sister, he had seen and spoke to Lowbacca and Zekk for a few minutes and he had also given Tahiri a hug and a ruffle of the hair in a brotherly manner. On the way back to his room, he had seen Tenel Ka entering hers.

An awkward moment of eye contact and a nod from both as she shuffled her luggage into her assigned quarters for the stay.

After her door had shut, Jacen had just stared at it, his eyes narrowed. She had no guards with her, she had been wearing her scaled armor. Jacen had no idea how she managed to get away from Hapes and her royal duty like that, but he silently commended her. She had to pull something very clever to manage that. His mind raced back to the odd silence that drifted between them for those few moments...

How could they have lost so much?

Solo was now in his quarters, his window open. He was laying on his bed, on his back, his head hanging over the edge towards the early evening air that blew in and danced across his cheeks. He was staring at the window upside-down, arms spread out to his sides, lining the edges of the bed. The canyon walls that filled the view from his chambers seemed to calm him. He wanted to get up and do something, but this satisfied him enough - content with just gazing to the setting suns and the light they created when they hit the canyon walls.

_we should think about,_

_what we got right now,_

_cause the good things are made up of time._

"Comm 'em up, Low, come on," Zekk slapped his wookiee companion on the back, his green eyes glittering with subdued excitement. "I have a deck. I have credits, I'm sure you do too."

With an affirmative growl, Lowbacca slapped the comm unit on the table between them and connected to Jaina's quarters.

"Hey Lowie, what's up?" Her voice chimed over the speaker.

He grunted and growled, relaying to Jaina what he and Zekk decided for the evening. The black-haired male was sitting across from him, nodding slowly at every word, strands of hair drifting from behind his ears and falling into his field of vision.

A few chuckles from the female Solo and she agreed, "Alright, I'll comm Tahiri and Tenel Ka and the rest and see what they're up to."

Lowbacca growled happily.

"Hey Jaina," Zekk interjected, "where do you think this should happen? You know the place better than we do."

The comm silenced on the other end as Jaina thought about where they could all meet up. She had gotten to the Academy and instantly set off to explore and question her Uncle about the layout of the place.

"The control room. It's on the top floor. It's a huge room, and the meeting table up there will fit the lot of us."

"Thanks Goddess, good call. We'll find it."

With a giggle, Jaina cut the connection.

_smile to your problems,_

_leave the past behind._

_never forget this._

Glancing from the reds and purples of the stone chasms, Jacen sat upright as his holo unit began blinking. His vision blanked out for a moment as the blood circulated back into his head, but the feeling quickly subsided and he rushed over to the wall, pressing the receive button.

Zekk's smirking face appeared.

"Hey Zekk."

"Jaaaaaacen, up for some sabacc? I know a popular, rich man like you must have some credits stashed somewhere for times like these."

With a laugh, Jacen slowly shook his head. "No thanks, Zekk. I might have a few credits, but I'm nowhere near rich, not rich enough to gamble them anyways, especially considering how horrible I am at that kriffing game."

Zekk noticed the distant air of Jacen's words, the hollow look in his eyes. His silly attitude evaporated for a moment, "You alright?"

"I'm fine, thanks Zekk. I guess I'm just a little tired."

Reassured of his friend's status, the blanket of sarcasm enveloped him once more, "Alright man, your call. You go get some rest. While you're doing that, I'll be swiping every credit from your sister, this walking carpet over here--" with a jerk of the thumb, Zekk smirked. Jacen could hear Lowie bellowing in the background. "--and whoever else decides they think they can take me."

The unit shut off as Zekk disconnected, leaving a slightly grinning Jacen Solo standing aloof beside the wall.

_find the truth in your soul,_

_keeping you alive._

Clapping each other on the back and laughing; actions that put a grin on her face. Everyone was together. Everyone was happy. Jaina hadn't seen this many smiling faces since the Academy on Yavin 4. Alema Rar was telling a story to Zekk and Lowbacca, Tahiri Veila and Tesar Sebatyne were giggling to each other about some odd joke. Tekli was quietly conversing with Cilghal - they both had just come to watch.

"Where's Jacen?" She inquired to Zekk as Alema finished her story.

"He looked a bit tired - he gave me no reason why he didn't want to come. But he looked like he needed rest, so I didn't bug him about it." He paused and watched Jaina nod, then he spoke up. "What about Tenel Ka?"

"She never answered her comm unit. Her trip was fairly long though, I wouldn't be surprised if she was sleeping."

Zekk tilted his head, "True. Oh well, we'll just have to bet more credits in their honor."

With a scoffing sound, Jaina pushed past the shining emerald eyes and stalked to the table, where she sat down and fell into the right mindset. Tekli and Cilghal stood over them all as they sat, dealing, betting and playing sabacc.

The room they were in was dim, the only light coming from the small lamps over the conference table and the glow of the holo-screen along the back wall. The control room was a room used for checking the power of the Academy, taking care of all the machinery and such. There was a security system installed for extra protection and care, just in case anything ever occurred and people had to stand guard. The system helped - it had holo-recorders just about everywhere. No one really minded them though, because no one was ever in the control room to watch them. So people always went about their ways.

The light from the wall of holo-screens spilled over the sabacc cards and cast soft shadows and shapes on the faces of the players, who looked at each other with the stoniest expressions possible. The light moved and transformed over their visages as people in other parts of the Academy went about their businesses, each movement causing the holo-recorders to pick it up. Each movement causing the light to change on the player's faces.

With a snicker, Zekk pulled his cards towards him.

_going on from minute to minute._

_don't shade the future,_

_with all that's behind._

_live for today._

His feet had carried him out of his room, his mind - lost somewhere, his eyes glazed over. Jacen stumbled down the hallway, ready to end this awkward state once and for all. It had been plaguing him ever since those seconds of silence in the corridor, the locked gaze - it was like the look someone would get when they were stabbed in the back with the vibroblade, or shot in the stomach - that wide-eyed look of shock. They both had that expression as they stared to one another in the hallway, then she just nodded. He nodded. She went into her room.

They had drifted apart during the war, briefly falling back into each other's orbit during the mission to Myrkr. Even though it was a solemn mission, filled with gore, death and anger, every second he had spent near her gave him a heightened amount of energy and strength. Then they were torn apart once more.

Was it the fact that she became Queen Mother? It could easily be fixed; nothing stops true love, right?

Was it the whole situation with Danni? Danni said it herself, to his face, she wasn't thinking straight. She loved him, just not like that.

Was it... what was it?

Time had torn them apart, the past few years had violently ripped them from each other, their seams struggling to hold on to their connection, their relationship. Now. Right now and the future was the time to sew the stitches back up. Jacen had no idea how long it would take, but he would wait and work at it.

He drew in a deep breath, clenched his right fist and brought it to the door, delivering a knock.

_the past is all that's gone,_

_the future is yet to come._

"Sithspit!" Zekk threw his cards on the table and stood up, storming across the room to calm down. With a sarcastic chortle, Lowbacca pulled all the credits from Zekk's spot to his own and prepared another hand.

Jaina tried to hold back her smile, "Zekk, you in on this round?"

"I'm out for now." He stood with face scrunched in a look of disgust, back to the table. His eyes suddenly fixed to the screens, interested in everything going on.

Solo looked to the wookiee, "Lowie, sit me out on this one too." She slid out of her chair and clapped Tahiri's back on the way by the blonde's seat, just an expression of friendship. There had been a lot of that going on throughout the night. Stalking across the room towards the glow of the holo-screens, she came up behind Zekk. "You alright?" Her voice was lowered as her hand slid up on his shoulder.

"I'm fine." A small grin appeared over his pale skin, it comforted Jaina. It was the smile he always gave when he knew he was acting stupid. "Damn furball just took all my credits."

Jaina's eyes went from him, to the view of the screens over his shoulder. She saw Mara and Luke in their quarters, watching a children's holovid with Ben, who was jumping on the couch. She saw her parents, they had fallen asleep on the sofa. Leia had to be at the meeting, even though she wasn't a full Jedi yet. She was one of the major political links from the Jedi to the Galactic Alliance. Jaina saw Kenth Hamner and Corran Horn, along with Wedge and a few of the pilots downing some ale in the main meeting area. The pilots were here as escorts - they didn't mind. Things were peaceful so they had no missions to fly.

She moved to the next screen and her jaw dropped at what she saw. "Zekk, look." Nodding her head towards where she was intently staring, she noticed Zekk follow her gaze to a holo-screen in the second row, sixth from the left.

They could see Jacen's back, his hands moving at extreme speeds as he tried to explain something. Tenel Ka stood across the room from him, watching him and pacing, her copper hair loose and trailing behind her like a cloak. Every once in awhile, she would deliver a seemingly short reply and Jacen would continue his banter.

"I wish we could hear what was going on." Jaina leaned closer to the holo-screen.

"Damn her for her skill in being expressionless..." Zekk crossed his arms and leaned in as well. Since Tenel Ka was the only face they could see, they couldn't tell what the emotion was floating through the room. They tried to prod at it with the Force and they got nothing. They also couldn't see Jacen's expression - his would tell the whole story.

Seconds later, as if he heard their silent pleas for him to turn, he spun around, tears forming in his eyes, breathing heavy.

They saw him mouth three words, they could tell he was stammering each one.

_"I love you."_

Jaina felt Zekk grab her wrist, she also heard Zekk and felt herself suck in their breath and hold it.

It seemed like time had stopped at that point, something had happened that Jaina and Zekk had never expected to see in their lives. They used to place bets when they were younger on if it would ever happen. And it finally did.

"Come on..." Jaina whispered, almost silently, pleading for her brother to pull through - to stay emotionally stable. "I knew you had it in you, you idiot."

Zekk and Jaina watched as Tenel Ka stepped up behind and spun him around, pulling herself on her toes to kiss him. Something the two watching didn't expect, Jacen didn't expect it either - but it didn't faze him one bit. He seemed to melt into the kiss, his hands finding their way to the Hapan's neck and shoulders.

Jaina glanced to her dark-haired companion, "Hey, I said it would happen one day. That's twenty credits you owe me."

With a gasp, Zekk's head snapped in her direction, "THAT BET WAS TEN YEARS AGO."

"Pay up, buddy," the sparkle in her eye was one Zekk hadn't seen for many, many years - it still made his heart race. He tried to hide his sudden giddy emotions and with a playful smirk and he followed her back to the table, leaving the holo-screens to go about their business.

_this moment is all our own._

_we should live this way,_

_just building up our day,_

_now and forever._

Jacen stood in the middle of the room, Tenel Ka wrapped in his arms. They had been in that embrace for at least ten standard minutes now, her head buried in his neck, his arms around her shoulders. His gaze was locked on the view of the canyons outside of her window that the moonlight was now dancing upon. The blues and grays filtered into her room, from the dull reflections off of the stones and lit up his brandy-brown gaze. The glow seemed to seep into the tears at the corners of his eyes and as they trailed down his cheeks, it seemed like the moonlight itself was falling.

Jacen Solo realized that stitching the seams back up might not take that long. But no matter how long it took, he would keep at it, now and forever.


End file.
